Oct 19

"Thus says the Lord: stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is; and walk in it, and find rest for your souls." Jeremiah 6:16

There's nothing for us to find or create, no skill or wisdom we need. We need only ask and follow. Footsteps.

"The wise men shall be put to shame;

they shall be dismayed and taken;

behold, they have rejected the word of the Lord;

so what wisdom is in them?" Jeremiah 8:9

The world's wisdom is not something to be pursued. It is empty. hollow. dead. 

"The hope of the righteous brings joy, 

but the expectation of the wicked will perish." Proverbs 10:28

Praise the Lord! My wicked hopes and desires (expectations) will perish. My evil will come to an end. It does not last.

"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, 

but with the humble is wisdom." Proverbs 11:2

Lord, teach me humility. My pride is strong. I want to love you selflessly. Teach me your way. What ancient path will bring me to be humble? Service. 

"From prophet to priest, everyone deals falsely. They have healed the wound of my people lightly, saying, 'Peace, peace,' when there is no peace." Jeremiah 8:10-11

"One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; 

another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want." Proverbs 11:24

"Whoever captures souls is wise." Proverbs 11:30b. What does this mean?

"Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool, but wisdom is pleasure to a man of understanding." Proverbs 10:23

The journey itself is the reward, where we are blessed and loved and challenged and grow. <3 If what we are in our final moments (the destination) were all our lives were for, the whole good God had created us for, then he could have created us at that point. The whole song gives the final note its meaning, and what I do today can take hold of the miracle that is life, and the love of God, and our wonderful, unbelievable gift of power to share that love. I don't want to take God for granted for a single day. 

"Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you, Oh Lord, my Rock and Redeemer." Psalm 9:14

"But let him who boasts boast in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord who practices steadfast love, justice, and righteousness in the earth. For in these things I delight, declares the Lord." Jeremiah 9:24

I have broken God's heart time and again. Betrayed trust, taken without giving back, rejecting gifts and turning from his love. Yet he wants me to just turn back and face him and accept his love again so he can heal my wounds and forgive me, and love me as if I never strayed, as if I were always faithful and true, perfect and lovely and beautiful. I need to humble myself to accept this love, because it means that I must accept that I don't deserve it and never can.

Do not hope in or fear idols. "Do not be afraid of them, for they cannot do evil, 

neither is it in them to do good." Jeremiah 10:5b

So, apparently, I've never been a Christian.

This idea has been nagging in the back of my mind for a while, that I might not have been honest with myself that I believe in what the Bible says. I've been baptized, confirmed, and I've gone to church most weeks. I was sure I fit the "Christian" label. And yet tonight, I went to worship large group and I had a sudden realization that none of this is real to me. It's a fantasy land to me. I really wish it were real, because it would be so awesome to have a god that looks down on us and loves us and cares for us, but it's just not true. We have no savior, we have no afterlife, it's all up to us. I don't know if it's completely "true" to some people, but I know that I don't believe, and so have never believed, that Jesus came down from heaven to save us. That whole story never made sense to me. What's up with who Jesus is? Is he God, able to do anything? Then how can he be limited in human form? Either he cannot relate to true humans, as God, or he cannot be all good, as a human. Did he even exist? I don't understand what that story is meant to say.

In a night, my life has become this much more lonely (losing a god? so sad...), but it is so real right now. I won't waste my life living for a god that doesn't exist, waiting for a call that will never come, asking for comfort and help that won't show up, except by coincidence. I don't have to blame myself for what goes wrong, because I can be sure that I am a human and that we make mistakes. If there is a perfect God, then when I mess up it can only be out of his "love." Do I realize how much nonsense that is? How can a loving god give out punishment, pain, death, and suffering on the levels that I experience day to day, not to mention what happens to so many people around the world with cancer and in prison and in wars. Now, I am free to work with the skills I have, unburdened by restrictive laws written for another culture, and I can know my limits. I have control. I have security. I have freedom. I can have peace and I can be real. Jesus is not real, and is certainly not alive in heaven. Ah, mind blown. I would that I could have realized this sooner. The pains of growing up Christian. :\

Give me a whiteboard and a camera

A little while ago, I had  a whiteboard and some free time, so I made pictures to help me memorize some verses. Enjoy the doodles!

Unreciprocated love.

1 Cor 5:6-8 ⁶Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump? ⁷ Cleanse out the old leaven that you may be a new lump, as you really are unleavened. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. ⁸ Let us therefore celebrate the festival, not with the old leaven, the leaven of malice and evil, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.

It's so diverse it could be a commercial!

I have hidden your word in my heart, that I may not sin against you.

But what does it mean that open rebuke is better than hidden love?

There should really be a bigger circle holding everything, because God can be in time and space.

 

 

That's a guy loving a widow, a child, and someone in jail.

Inspired by Bonhoeffer's Cost of Discipleship.

An old picture I took:
SPIRIT, CALL ME SON THAT I MAY SEEK MYSELF WITHOUT TIRING
DARKNESS, CALL ME BROTHER THAT I MAY NOT FEAR THAT WHICH I SEEK
LIGHT, CALL ME FRIEND THAT I BE NOT ASHAMED BY WHAT I FIND
DEATH, CALL ME GENTLY THAT I MAY ENJOY WHAT I HAVE BEEN.

Understanding what it means to "quench the Spirit." "The flow of the Holy Spirit power must never be held back. 'Do not quench (suppress or subdue) the (Holy) Spirit'" - I think this is from Angels on Assignment

Dim stars are still bright.

A Christian shines the light of God for the world to see. Few will become famous theologians or televangelists. Does that mean that we are any less loved by God, because we are not blessed with fame or dazzling success?

John 21:19-23. [Jesus] said to [Peter], “Follow Me!” 20Peter, turning around, saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following them;[...] 21So Peter seeing him said to Jesus, “Lord, and what about this man?” 22Jesus said to him, “If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow Me!” 23Therefore this saying went out among the brethren that that disciple would not die; yet Jesus did not say to him that he would not die, but only, “If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you?” (Emphasis my own)

Why are we so caught up with comparing what we have to what those around us have, even into the realm of spirituality and God? What is it to us if God has chosen to bless someone else with what you want? And yet, it hurts.

In a sky filled with stars, some are brighter than others. Many dimmer stars, white dwarfs, can look at one blue giant and say, "If only I was that bright! No one notices me because I'm so dim. I wish God had made me to be brighter. Then I could be great, and happy!" Most stars can find one brighter than them. But a planet can only orbit around a smaller star. The people on that planet only know their star, which thinks itself dim, to be the brightest thing they know, and they absolutely depend on it for life. If it were dimmer, they would freeze. And if it were brighter, as it wished, its excessive power would heat up the planet and they would burn.

No matter how much or how little pull we have in the grand scheme of things, every single person has a handful of others in their orbit that they affect daily, by their behavior and words. We are called to show the light of God to these people right around us, to those we can reach where we are, our neighbors, friends, and family. We may be the only light they can see.

Matthew 5:16 "Let your light shine"

To live for God beyond Sunday.

"Whatever you do, do well." Ecclesiastes 9:10

Work to grow closer to God in every action. 

14“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden; 15 nor does anyone light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. 16“Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven. Matthew 5

The harvest is plenty, and the workers are few, so that the only real encounter with Christianity some people have, the only Bible they will read, is the actions of a Christian, your actions. Walk with God always, looking for opportunities to serve someone. If you ever want to share the gospel (and you probably will), first be a witness with your life, showing love to your enemies, coworkers and neighbors. And then into a fertile spirit will your words fall, if God is willing.

“Preach the gospel at all times; when necessary, use words” - St. Francis of Assisi.

How much is a life worth?

How much is a life worth? Is it priceless to God? to me?

"Are not two sparrows sold for a cent? And yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows." Matthew 10:29-31

If a family of 4 can live on less than $10 a week, if a child can be fed for $15 a month, then is it right for me to get that new pair of shoes that are on sale, that I don't really need, that will sit in the closet, unworn and forgotten after a month, instead of donating money?
If I donate something else, like my time, blood, used cars, or professional skills, does that make it ok to in essence waste the resources I have been given? What did I do the last time I had a large chunk of free time? The last time I was bored? Did I seek out entertainment, to consume, or did I do something helpful, to serve or encourage?

Despite these questions rolling around in my head, I am not supposed to be crippled by guilt because I was born into a more wealthy country. I am to use the resources entrusted to me in the best way I can, as I should do everything I do. "Whatever you do, do well. For in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working, nor planning, nor knowledge, nor wisdom." Ecclesiastes 9:10

I must still do what I can, fight the war with the weapons of more education and money, to deal a blow to the enemy. "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." Luke 12:48. Because I can do more than those who need help, I must do more. But in the end I put my trust in God. In a war of this size, only He can make an impact. He will care for the poor unreached by my hands, He will use my talents and resources where they will fit into His plan the best. So I give over command of the fight to Him. It is God's war, and it will be His victory, when the pain and suffering stop. Until then, I am a footsoldier ready to jump into action when called to do my part.

I may give up something I really want to make sure I can fully tithe, to give my money to the God who gave it to me, but I may find peace and joy in the love of God in the midst of the battle. I am not guilty of a lack of compassion for the poor, the hungry, the widow, the orphan, simply because I have a new pair of shoes. But I am if I constantly, flagrantly overspend.

To end, here is a parable of Jesus from Matthew 25 about servants using what their master had lent them.
     14“For it is just like a man about to go on a journey, who called his own slaves and entrusted his possessions to them. 15“To one he gave five talents, to another, two, and to another, one, each according to his own ability; and he went on his journey. 16“Immediately the one who had received the five talents went and traded with them, and gained five more talents. 17“In the same manner the one who had received the two talents gained two more. 18“But he who received the one talent went away, and dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.
      19“Now after a long time the master of those slaves came and settled accounts with them. 20“The one who had received the five talents came up and brought five more talents, saying, ‘Master, you entrusted five talents to me. See, I have gained five more talents.’ 21“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’
      22“Also the one who had received the two talents came up and said, ‘Master, you entrusted two talents to me. See, I have gained two more talents.’ 23“His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.’
      24“And the one also who had received the one talent came up and said, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow and gathering where you scattered no seed. 25‘And I was afraid, and went away and hid your talent in the ground. See, you have what is yours.’
      26“But his master answered and said to him, ‘You wicked, lazy slave, you knew that I reap where I did not sow and gather where I scattered no seed. 27‘Then you ought to have put my money in the bank, and on my arrival I would have received my money back with interest. 28‘Therefore take away the talent from him, and give it to the one who has the ten talents.’

      29“For to everyone who has, more shall be given, and he will have an abundance; but from the one who does not have, even what he does have shall be taken away. 30“Throw out the worthless slave into the outer darkness; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.

http://irfanrasyid.blogspot.com/2010/01/food-costs-all-around-world.html

In a posture of prayer

So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth. Revelation 3:16

Say I want to move God and Christianity (Religion) from a Sunday morning activity to something more. How can I be "religious" even when I am not in church, not reading my Bible, not praying, and not listening to worship songs?

Peter and the other apostles replied: "We must obey God rather than men! Acts 5:29 

Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might, for in the grave, where you are going, there is neither working nor planning nor knowledge nor wisdom. Ecclesiastes 9:10

Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it;

Unless the LORD guards the city, the watchman keeps awake in vain. 

It is vain for you to rise up early, to retire late, to eat the bread of painful labors;

for He gives to His beloved even in his sleep. Psalm 127

Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 1 Corinthians 6:19

Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him; for God's temple is sacred, and you are that temple. 1 Corinthians 3:16-17 

Whatever does not proceed from faith is sin. Romans 14:22

Quick answer: I follow the commandments, acting ethically, with kindness, and putting forth my best effort in everything I do, while remaining humble to God's will and listening for whatever small or large things He commands.

First

What do you call a cow with one leg? Stake (steak)!

A blog is kind of like a pet. I have to feed it, play with it, make sure it's not sick. When it's young, it needs extra attention. I have to housebreak it and train it if I want it to be manageable when it is older. This post is a training post, to get things rolling. It has no actual content.

In the future, I plan to center this blog on (Christian) theological and religious discussion, experience, advice, reflection, and related topics. Of course, it will also touch on whatever I find interesting, and include pictures and diagrams. I need someone to hold me accountable on my walk with God, and a larger channel where I can pour out what has been given to me. Who and what better than the internet? This is one step of many in that walk, but a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. As one small step on the moon was a leap for mankind, now one small step into the cloud makes my heart leap with joy, to see that I'm actually doing now what I've had nagging in my mind for years. I can't wait to see where this takes me!

Now let's get this puppy started! (More jokes to follow.)